“The Be Blessed Attitudes”

CELEBRATE RECOVERY: THE ROAD TO HAPPINESS

Celebrate Recovery is a ministry designed to minister to our hurts, hang-ups and habits. So, if you have never had a problem, then you CR is not for you. If you have ever been hurt, or faced a problem, then CR is for you.

The principles of CR are based on the Beatitudes, which Christ preached and is recorded in Matthew 5. In Scripture, when the word “blessed” is used, it is correlated to the word “happy.” That’s why we say that Celebrate Recovery is the Road to Happiness, true happiness!

Almost everyone in the world desires true happiness. Unfortunately, many people look for happiness in the wrong places.

Perhaps they look for happiness in the bottle, or in sexual promiscuity, or in financial gain, or in monetary resources, or in controlling people, and the list goes on and on. As Christians, we know that true happiness comes only in a relationship with Jesus Christ!! But how do we get past our hurts, hang-ups and habits into that place we need to be – the fullness of a personal relationship with Christ Jesus?

That is why CR is so important.

Many people come to Christ, but they still have issues to deal with.

They still struggle with depression. They still struggle with fears. They still struggle with addictions.

And the more we release our hurts, hang-ups and habits, the more are able to connect with the Lord.

1Now when he saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, 2and he began to teach them saying:
3"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
5Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.
6Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
7Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
8Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
9Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.
10Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

11"Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

Do you ever stay up late when you know you need sleep?

Do you ever eat or drink more calories than your body needs?

Do you ever feel you ought to exercise but you don’t?

Do you ever know the right thing to do, but you don’t do it?

Do you ever know something is wrong, but you do it anyway?

Have you ever wanted to pay your tithes, but end up spending your money on debt or other things?

Have you ever known you should be unselfish, but you’re selfish instead?

Have you ever tried to control somebody or something and found it was uncontrollable?

If your answer is yes to any of those questions, welcome to the human race. We’re all in need of recovery.

R – (Principle 1) Realize that I need God and that I cannot be truly happy without Him. Matthew 5:3 says, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of God.”

This principle deals with humbling ourselves before God and releasing control to Him. Control is an issue all of us have to deal with. By nature we want to be in control. We want to be in the driver’s seat. Even Adam and Eve had a problem with control. God said “You can do anything you want to in this entire Paradise except one thing: Don’t eat from this certain tree.” What did they do? They made a beeline for that tree. The only thing in Paradise God said was off limits. Satan said, “Eat this apple (or whatever it was) and be gods.” That’s been the problem from the very start. I want to be God. I want to call the shots. I want to run my own life.

We want to be in control. I want to be at the center of my universe. I want to call the shots. Control is the real issue. Here are four examples of what we try to control:

1. We try to control our image. We want to control what other people think of us. We don’t want other people to really know what we’re like. We play games, we pretend, we fake it, we want people to see certain sides of us and we hide other parts, and we deny our weaknesses and we deny our feelings (“I’m not angry, I’m not upset, I’m not worried, I’m not afraid.”) We don’t want people to see the real us. Why am I afraid to tell you who I am? That’s the title of a book. The answer is: If I tell you who I really am and you don’t like it, tough for me ‘cause I’m all I got. So we try to hide and we try to control our image.

2. We try to control other people. Parents try to control kids; kids try to control parents. Wives try to control husbands; husbands try to control wives. People try to control other people. There are office politics in your office. Countries try to control other countries. We use a lot of tools to manipulate each other. We use guilt to control, we use fear, we use praise, some of you use the silent treatment to control, anger, rage. We try to control people.

3. We try to control problems, our problems. We’re good at this. We use phrases like: “I can handle it, it’s not really a problem.” That’s somebody trying to play God. “I can handle it, I’m O.K. Really, I’m fine.” We control our problems: I don’t need any help and I certainly don’t need counseling. We try to control our problems: I can quit any time, I’ll work it out on my own. The more you try to fix your problem yourself, the worse the problem gets.

4. We try to control our pain. Have you ever thought how much time you spend running from pain? Trying to avoid it, deny it, escape it, reduce it, postpone it. People try to postpone it many different ways. Sometimes we try to postpone our pain by eating or not eating. We try to postpone our pain by getting drunk or by smoking or by taking drugs or by getting in and out of relationships. “This next relationship is what I really need to feel really whole and significant.” And you get in the relationship— “Oh, that wasn’t it” and you get out … It’s in and out of one relationship after another. Or you develop some kind of compulsive habit to try to control your pain. Or you become abusive and you get angry with other people or critical and judgmental to hide your pain. Or you get depressed. There are many, many ways we try to control our pain.

Pain comes when we realize in our quiet moments we’re not God and we can’t control everything and that’s scary.

The first step to recovery is Realize that I need God and that I cannot be truly happy without Him.

E – (Principle 2) Earnestly place my faith in Jesus Christ, and know that the Holy Spirit has the power to help me get up when I am knocked down.

. . . . Pastor Dennis Bonnet speaks

Matthew 5:4 (NIV) “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.”

Hebrews 11:6b (NIV) “anyone who comes to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.”

1 – Acknowledge God’s existence

2 – Understand God’s character.

C – (Principle 3) Commit my life wholeheartedly to Christ and surrender to His will.

. . . . Pastor Justin Weaver speaks

Matthew 5:5 (NIV) “Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.”

O – (Principle 4) Openly pursue a life that honors God. Matthew 5:6 (NIV) says “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.”

1 – Take a personal inventory.

Ask yourself . . . am I truly happy?

Are my priorities in place?

Do I find myself wishing I was someone else?

Do I have anger issues?

Do I have issues that I’m dealing with?

Psalm 139:23 says, “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. 24 See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

Take a personal inventory

2 – Hunger and thirst for righteousness.

The other day, I heard that Tuesdays is the most productive work day of the week. Mondays, people are tired and slow. Wednesdays they call hump day. On Fridays, most everyone is already in the weekend mode.

Friday comes, and a co-worker tells you that she is going through some difficult times. Then, she says, I can’t wait to go out tonight and drink until I don’t have a care in the world.

Wouldn’t it be great for you to say, “I have an answer. Instead of going out to the club tonight, let’s go get a bite to eat, and then, let’s go to a place called Celebrate Recovery.

Most everyone is thinking, “I can’t wait til Friday – the weekend partying time is here.”

When you hunger and thirst for righteousness, you say, “I can’t til Friday, - Celebrate Recovery is going to be a great time of refreshment after a tough week.”

Hunger and thirst for righteousness.

3 – Let the Spirit of God fill your tank.

“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.”

Let The Holy Spirit fill your tank.

This is the only way to true happiness.

V – (Principle 5) Value forgiveness.

Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy. (Matt. 5:7)

We've all been hurt before. Someone did us wrong or said something against us, and left us with deep hurt. You can't do anything about what they've done or said, but you can do something about how you respond. Unforgiveness is probably the number one hindrance for most people to experiencing true joy and peace in life. Is forgiving important? Yes it is. It was so important that God sent His only Son so that you and I could be forgiven.

If our greatest need had been information, God would have sent us an educator. If our greatest need had been technology, God would have sent us a scientist. If our greatest need had been money, God would have sent us an economist. If our greatest need had been pleasure, God would have sent us an entertainer. But our greatest need was forgiveness, so God sent us a Savior.

Forgiveness: Clearing the record of those who have wronged me and not holding a grudge. We must value forgiveness.

A story of forgiveness: The hospital was unusually quiet that bleak January evening, quiet and still like the air before a storm. I stood in the nurses’ station on the 7th floor and glanced at the clock. It was 9 p.m. I threw a stethoscope around my neck and headed for room 712, last room on the hall. Room 712 had a new patient. Mr. Williams.

As I entered the room, Mr. Williams looked up eagerly, but dropped his eyes when he saw it was only me, his nurse. He looked up from his starched white bed. “Nurse, would you - would you call my daughter? Tell her I’ve had a heart attack. You see, I live alone and she is the only family I have.” His respiration suddenly speeded up. I turned his nasal oxygen up to eight liters a minute. “Of course I’ll call her.” I said, studying his face. He gripped the sheets and pulled himself forward, his face tense with urgency. “Will you call her right away—as soon as you can?” He was breathing fast—too fast. “I’ll call her the very first thing,” I said, patting his shoulder. I flipped off the light. He closed his eyes, such young blue eyes in his 50-year-old face.

“Nurse,” he called, “could you get me a pencil and paper?” I dug a scrap of yellow paper and a pen from my pocket and set it on the bedside table. I walked back to the nurses’ station and called Mr. Williams daughter.

“Janie, this is Sue Kidd, a registered nurse at the hospital. I’m calling about your father. He was admitted tonight with a slight heart attack and—”

“No!” she screamed into the phone, startling me. “He’s not dying is he?”

“His condition is stable at the moment,” I said.

“You must not let him die!” she said. Her voice was so utterly compelling that my hand trembled on the phone.

“He is getting the very best care.”

“But you don’t understand,” she pleaded. “My daddy and I haven’t spoken in almost a year. We had a terrible argument on my 21st birthday, over my boyfriend. I ran out of the house. I—I haven’t been back. All these months I’ve wanted to go to him for forgiveness. The last thing I said to him was, ‘I hate you.’”

“I’m coming. Now! I’ll be there in 30 minutes,” she said. Click. She had hung up.

I went back to room 712 to check for Mr. Williams pulse. There was none. “Code 99. Room 712. Code 99. Stat.” The alert was shooting through the hospital within seconds after I called the switchboard through the intercom by the bed. Mr. Williams had had a cardiac arrest. With lightning speed I leveled the bed and bent over his mouth, breathing air into his lungs. I positioned my hands over his chest and compressed. One, two, three. I tried to count. At 15 I moved back to his mouth and breathed as deeply as I could. Where

was help? Again I compressed and breathed. Compressed and breathed. He could not die!

“O God,” I prayed. “His daughter is coming. Don’t let it end this way.” The door burst open. Doctors and nurses poured into the room pushing emergency equipment. A doctor took over the manual compression of the heart. A tube was inserted through his mouth as an airway. Nurses plunged syringes of medicine into the intravenous tubing. I connected the heart monitor. Nothing. Not a beat. My own heart pounded. “God, don’t let it end like this.”

“Stand back,” cried a doctor. I handed him the paddles for the electrical shock to the heart. He placed them on Mr. William’s chest. Over and over we tried. But nothing. No response. Mr. Williams was dead. A nurse unplugged the oxygen. The gurgling stopped. One by one they left, grim and silent.

How could this happen? How? I stood by his bed, stunned. When I left the room, I saw her against the wall by a water fountain. Such pathetic hurt reflected from her face. Such wounded eyes. She knew. The doctor had told her that her father was gone. I took her hand and led her into the nurses’ lounge. We sat on little green stools, neither saying a word. She stared straight ahead at a pharmaceutical calendar, glass-faced, almost breakable-looking. “Janie, I’m so sorry,” I said. It was pitifully inadequate.

“I never hated him, you know. I loved him,” she said.

God, please help her, I thought. Suddenly she whirled toward me. “I want to see him.”

My first thought was, Why put yourself through more pain? Seeing him will only make it worse. But I got up and wrapped my arm around her. We walked slowly down the corridor to 712. Outside the door I squeezed her hand, wishing she would change her mind about going inside. She pushed open the door. We moved to the bed, huddled together, taking small steps in unison. Janie leaned over the bed and buried her face in the sheets. I tried not to look at her, at this sad, sad good-bye. I backed against the bedside table. My hand fell upon a scrap of yellow paper. I picked it up. It read:

My dearest Janie, I forgive you. I pray you will also forgive me. I know that you love me. I love you too. Daddy

The note was shaking in my hands as I thrust it toward Janie. She read it once. Then twice. Her tormented face grew radiant. Peace began to glisten in her eyes. She hugged the scrap of paper to her breast.

“Thank You, God,” I whispered, looking up at the window. Life seemed as fragile as a snowflake on the window. But thank You, God, that relationships, sometimes fragile as snowflakes, can be mended together again.

I crept from the room and hurried to the phone. I would call my father. I would say, “I love you.”

Matthew 6:14, 15 says "For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." Matthew 6:14, 15

E – (Principle 6) Evaluate my motives, convictions and character.

. . . Pastor Justin Weaver speaks:

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. (Matt. 5:8)

R – (Principle 7) Restore peace with others and peace with God.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God. (Matt. 5:9)

Three levels of peace.

1) Peace with others.

A few years ago, I received a nasty letter from someone who I didn’t realize had bitterness toward me. And I really didn’t understand why. My human nature was to strike back and give him a piece of my mind. But then, I prayed about it and realized that he was hurting, and hurting people hurt people. So, I got out a nice card and wrote him a note of encouragement. Everything positive. I told him that I loved him in the Lord and that I would pray that God would bless him greatly. He stopped. No more letters. No more backbiting. Because God showed me how to be a peacemaker.

It doesn’t matter who is right, it matters who makes things right.

Blessed are the peacemakers . . . .You will not be blessed . . . you will not be truly happy until you make peace with those you are at odds with.

2) Peace with God.

You cannot have peace with God, until you are first peace with others.

You cannot say you love God who you cannot see and yet not love people who you see.

3) Peace of God.

Ephesians 2:14 For he himself is our peace, who has made the two one and has destroyed the barrier, the dividing wall of hostility, (v. 15) by abolishing in his flesh the law with its commandments and regulations. His purpose was to create in himself one new man out of the two, thus making peace, (v. 16) and in this one body to reconcile both of them to God through the cross, by which he put to death their hostility. (v. 17) He came and preached peace to you who were far away and peace to those who were near. (v. 18) For through him we both have access to the Father by one Spirit.

Jesus gave his life to bring peace into this world.

He was a peacemaker.

Let’s be like Jesus!

Y – (Principle 8) Yield myself to the cost of being a disciple of Jesus Christ. . . . Pastor Dennis Bonnet speaks:

Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. (Matt. 5:10)

How can God use my hurts, my pain?

1) He uses them to give us a ministry to others

Genesis 37 - 50

2) He uses them to teach us to depend on Him

2 Cor 1:8 & 9

R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y.

8 principles based on the Beatitudes

R (Principle 1) Realize that I need God and that I cannot be truly happy without Him.

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. (Matt. 5:3)

E (Principle 2) Earnestly place my faith in Jesus Christ, and know that the Holy Spirit has the power to help me get up when I am knocked down.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted (Matt. 5:4)

C (Principle 3) Commit my life wholeheartedly to Christ and surrender to His will.

Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. (Matt. 5:5)

O (Principle 4) Openly pursue a life that honors God.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. (Matt 5:6)